let's see that baby

Today is ultrasound day! And even though we are already 95% sure it's a boy...it's still exciting! Eric managed to get off work for it, which makes me happy because I thought I might have to go alone and...there is just something depressing about that. I have done it 2 times before, but I still think Eric should be there. This time is just as important as the others.
We have been gong back and forth all week about weather or not we're going camping this weekend and I am truly torn. At first I put my foot down and said we weren't going b/c we don't have the extra money, we're already behind and we have a bachlor/ette party to throw in 3 weeks and then a wedding shower and then a wedding; which our entire family is in..so..money is tighter than normal. Eric had a point when he said, "money is always tight and this would be the last time we go before the baby goes and the kids will have so much fun. Plus, we'll just sit around all weekend, wishing we were there."
And, he's right. I'm doing dishes today thinking about how much I want to go and get away for the weekend and how much fun the kids have and how..we never have money and it hasnt ever stopped us before. I hate not living the life I want to because of what will happen next month..how bad could it really get? it's already bad.
I think I might just go. Even though I preggers and I can't get the total experience of the fest, the kids deserve it and Eric does too. And anything else that would be fun and would keep our minds off of it.would cost money too.
Plus, I cannot bear the thought of another weekend sitting here with my freakin drunk ass in laws. I need a beak. I just wonder how much stuyding I'll actually do, consdiering my finals are next week.
it pisses me off, actually..I'm dissapointed in myself that I cannot get all a's this semester and keep my 4.0. But, I should remind myself that a "b" is good and I am a mother of 2 who works and is preg...soo..quit being so hard on myself.As long as I pass...and get into the damn program..I really dont care. lol. I should, but in a way..I dont.